For the month of February, my wife and I decided to do a Fast Food Free February.  Any place where we have to go to the counter to order receive our food is off limits.  Below is my imaginary journal for the month.

Day 1: Well, I didn’t get the chance to run out and grab some fast food last night.  Tuesdays are always busy, but I had two meetings right before prayer service, so this week was extra busy.  I considered a brief run to Crawfordsville before heading home, but I was just too tired.

Day 2: Another busy 24 hours. It helps keep my mind off the fast food.  Doctor appointment, a rescheduled counseling session, bell choir.  Breakfast with local pastors and Movie Night tonight mean a couple of sit down meals, but not fast food.

Day 3: First real challenge today.  We didn’t really have anything on our schedule, so we had no real reason to be out, but we did end up going to get some groceries just before lunch time.  Crisis averted, though, we still had an Applebee’s gift card from Christmas.  The one in Crawfordsville redeemed itself today.

Day 4: Birthday party in Indy tonight.  Leaving early to go to the Apple store. Have to get a sandwich before we left, or else I won’t make it to dinner.

Day 5: Super Bowl party cancelled due to illness tonight.  There’s a lot of pizza that should last us most of the week.  This Fast Food Free February is going to be a breeze.

Day 6: Feeling sick today. Didn’t want to eat much of anything.  I think I finally had a bowl of leftover pasta for dinner. Don’t even want to think about food.

Day 7: Feeling better, but still not terribly hungry today. Another busy one. No time to even think about fast food.

Day 8: Seminar in Terre Haue today. DS paying for lunch at local cafeteria. Not fast food. Sweet!

Day 9: Home alone for most of the day today. Feeling the need for some warm fries & a cheeseburger. Just need to get to work & forget about it.

Day 10: Nothing planned today.  Good.  You’d think after 10 days, the desire would be gone, but it’s not.  I could definitely go for some Chick-Fil-A today.  Good thing the closest one is over an hour away.

Day 11: Brother-in-law’s birthday.  Nacho night with the in-laws.  As long as we leave after lunch, I think I’ll be all right.

Day 12: Today was another busy day.  Board meeting, and fundraiser lunch.  Too tired to even want to go out to grab a quick bite.

Day 13: What is up with this month?!? I have another meeting tonight.  Keeping busy keeps me away from the fast food cravings, but now I’m starting to wear down a little.

Day 14: It’s Valentine’s Day.  Nothing says I love you like a Big Mac…

Day 15: I dreamt about waffle fries last night.  It was like the scene with the Sirens in The Odyssey.  They were calling my name, but I forced my crew to stop up their ears and keep rowing while I was tied to the mast.  I woke up in cold sweats.

Day 16: Today is going to be a challenge.  Going to Indy for Our Life Together.  Already have plans for lunch, so that shouldn’t be too bad, but also planning on going to the Pacers game.  The hot dogs will be calling my name from the concession stands.  Can’t do it.  Must remain strong.

Day 17: Day 2 of Our Life Together.  Ends at lunch time.  Just need to go straight home.  Must resist…

Day 18: Another dream last night.  I was on a boat again (what’s up with these boat dreams?).  Only this time, there was just two music notes, alternating back and forth.  Richard Dreyfuss was there, hanging out the back of the boat when, suddenly, he was gone.  I giant Whopper came out of the sea, taking Richard Dreyfuss and half the aft with him.  More cold sweats.

Day 19: Lost some hair this morning.  Not sure what is going on.  It just started coming out while I was in the shower.  Patches of baldness all over the place.  Had to shave my whole head.

Day 20: Tried to do some work today.  As I was typing on the computer, my fingers turned into fries.  They smelled so good.  I had to take a bite.  Left pinky finger is swollen and bruised now.

Day 21: Buster went to Wendy’s today.  That little jerk of a cat just took my keeeyss and drov to the pig-tailed temptresses’ lair, bought a single and ate it right in front of me. musterd & pikles too, just the way I like it.

Day 22: Not sure what happened yesterday.  Seems like the whole day was just blacked out.

Day 23: Today’s my birthday!  I have another day-long seminar in Terre Haute, then Katie and I are going to eat at Chief’s in Greencastle for dinner.  Hello, Bubbaz Blackened Voodoo Strip Steak!

Day 24: Yesterday waz my birtday. I shul hav what I want for my birtday. Need cheezeburger…. CHEEZEBURGER!!!!

Day 25: Got some coupons in the mail today. Arby’s. STAY AWAY FROM THEM, PORK CHOP!!!  THESE R MINE!!! MINE! MINE MINEEEE!!!!! Yesss…. MY PRECIOUS…..

Day 26: Family came over for birthday lunch today after church. None of them would slip out and get me some Long John Silvers. My family hates me.

Day 27: Ministry Team meeting tongith. I think we should do a street bazaar and give everybody cheezeburgerss.  FREE CHEZZBURGERZ FOR EVERYSBODYS!!!!!

Day 28: JALOAN KJHAOKLAN ALKJION KAN AFNA;JK 90UBVA

Day 29: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE ARE 29 DAYS IN FEBURAYR THIS YEAR!!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHHHHHHHHHHH…..

March 1st, 12:02 a.m.:  “Yes, I’d like a Big Mac, 20 piece Chicken McNuggets with Sweet & Sour Sauce, a two cheeseburger meal, an extra order of large fries, and four large Cokes.  No, I don’t need a drink carrier.  Thank you.”

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